Why new year’s resolution fail: Mindset Mastery 1

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Most people will passively do exactly what they did last year. Whatever you do, don’t let that person be you. 

Richie Norton

Numerous people aspire for change at the commencement of a new year without creating a space for growth.

One of the reasons why numerous new year’s resolutions fail is grounded on a wrong or fixed mindset.

Growth is an ineluctable part of life and Having a growth mindset (the belief that you’re in control of your capability, and can learn and improve) is the key to success

What a new year with no new exposure? What is a new year with no new task and responsibilities?
What a new year without a difference?

Having a “ growth mindset” has never been more important than it is now.
The world is changing at an incredibly fast pace, and there are new challenges we must face every day. This is why having a growth mindset is so necessary.

A new goal with an old mindset will be equal to an old result.

According to Carol Dweck, a researcher at Stanford University, there are two types of mindsets: a fixed mindset and a growth mindset.

“In a fixed mindset, people believe their qualities are fixed traits and therefore cannot change.”

“In a growth mindset, people have an underlying belief that their learning and intelligence can grow with time and experience.”

Having a “ growth mindset” means you understand that you can adjust or learn more, as long as you put in the effort. Having a growth mindset will encourage you to learn, adjust and evolve.

People with growth mindsets worry about actually learning and view disappointment as an occasion to learn. They tend to try harder to overcome the efforts. For example, a person with a fixed mindset may say they ’re not “ good with car washing” to avoid washing. While they can avoid failure and struggle with this reason, they’re putting off the opportunity to learn, grow, and develop a growth mindset.

A person with a growth mindset would be willing to attempt or risk trying, even if they struggle and fail during their first trial. People with growth mindsets see failures and lapses as an opportunity to grow.

Comfortability places restrictions on the mind and causes a poor attempt to new tasks. A growth mindset would beget you to stretch yourself beyond comfort and constantly reach out to your goals and aspiration.

Growth mindsets understand the significance of continuity and determination.

Are you ashamed of having a fixed mindset? Do you think you are not smart enough” Fixed mindsets lead you to avoid tasks where you may struggle or feel like a failure, If you find yourself saying things like “ I’m not good with math, so I can’t try, you might have a fixed mindset?

Developing a growth mindset isn’t only a better way to learn but also a better way to live. The single most important thing you can ever do to help you achieve success is to cultivate a growth mindset. This may not be an easy task but it surely worth the time and effort.

Accepting that your abilities and intelligence can be developed allows you to explore, experience, and achieve more in life.

Cultivate seeing criticisms as blessing from others.

Nevertheless, While learning, view challenges as openings to growth. Try to review what failure means to you, and remember that patience and tolerance is crucial.

The moment we believe that success is determined by an ingrained level of ability as opposed to resilience and hard work, we will be brittle in the face of adversity.

Joshua Waitzkin

This year, Go after your fears

Stretch beyond comfort

Make an excuse to go beyond your limitations

And, show up for your goals and aspiration.

A failure to take precise and deliberate action is the reason why so many New Year’s resolutions and other goals fail. 

Jordan Ring

One resolution I have made, and try always to keep, is this: To rise above the little things. 

John Burroughs
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Why new year’s resolution fail: Mindset Mastery 1
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Kick start to 2022

Great works are performed not by strength but by perseverance.”

Samuel Johnson

Sometimes, much less says extra. The point that this quote is making is that one of the most vital matters in existence is having the desire to persevere even if matters get tough.

 Perseverance means more than simply trying, it means setting the whole lot you’ve got into something. Perseverance offers you the desire, Strength, and the heart to do whatever you’ve positioned your thoughts to. 

You may have all the strength withinside the world, however if you do not have the perseverance to push yourself while matters get tough, strength means nothing.

While setting new goals for a new year may be quite fascinating. 

How well are you eager to see them work!

What happens at a point when you feel like giving up on everything!

So much perseverance and persistence is needed to get things excellently done.

Having a strong desire for growth financially, mentally, physically, emotionally or even spiritually requires so much diligence, consistency and perseverance.

Think about this!

Welcome to 2022

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Be encouraged

Occasionally life’s twists and turns can make you forget what’s really important. After a hard day at work, sensitive monetary situation, or a big loss, you can lose sight of the important stuff like your health, and the love you share with confidants and family.

That’s why it’s important to have a strong faith. Your faith and trust in God will help you stay motivated, reach your plans, and come out triumphant on the other side.

Even so, always remember that”God never said that the journey would be easy, but He did say that the arrival would be worthwhile.

Stay encouraged😍

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You are not alone

“You are not alone. God understands what you’re going through and has promised to be with you in every trail of life.”

Anonymous

For many folks, life could also be a struggle. Unless you’re lucky, you will have periods in your life where things won’t go your way, and it will be difficult to induce through these periods. We all struggle but for some, that struggle is extremely hard to manage.

There are a lot of struggles lately, the battle of what to undertake and do at a very moment when everyone expects from you, and you’ve got countless pressures.I’ve struggled loads over the past couple of years and it is not a fairytale experience.I struggle daily. With my thoughts, my psychological state, myself

While walking on campus on a particular day, I attempted to conclude something that looked like it thereafter; I became nervous and had an ill feeling towards that decision, but before I could place importance on my feelings. I heard a voice call out my fears and warranted me there is not anywhere I’m going he won’t be with me.

‘I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you.’ ~ Joshua 1:5

At that moment I remember I wasn’t alone, that the father(God) is most interested in all the little print of my life including those yet to figure out.

God is within you, you will not fail

Dear reader, Life comes with different phases, times and seasons that differ to each one of us. Yes, there are times  I have felt exhausted trying to make efforts, times have been overwhelmed with fear, doubt and uncertainty and lose sight of God’s presence.

Amid these trying times and Uncertainty, the scriptures never changed a small amount from the reality that I am and can never be alone.

“Knowing that you’re not alone really does make all the difference in the world. “

Norman Hamilton

Beloved, God knows your past, your future and he’s fully aware of where you are coming from, the fears, doubt, and uncertainty, and he wants to hold your hands through life to prove his words that He will never leave nor forsake us, rather he will go before you.

Isaiah 43:2 Amplified Bible “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;And through the rivers, they will not overwhelm you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be scorched,Nor will the flame burn you.

There are times you may experience loneliness, a phase where everyone seems to not understand you, and trust could also be broken, but there’s someone out there who cares for you and understands your silence over your words.

In times like that, we have got a word of assurance and reality that God will never leave nor forsake us.

Always remember, God is so curious about giving beauty to your ashes and crafting a reasonable story from your struggles. Not minding how ordinary or helpless you feel you’re, you’re special to God

“You are not alone and this is not the end of your story.”

Anonymous
Keep glowing

For more encouragement,You can read one of my favourite blogpost Click to Read

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The Believer’s Joy

Sometimes, people confuse joy with Happiness. Happiness is characterized by good luck or fortune. This suggests that when there’s misfortune, happiness disappears and misery sets in – it’s momentary

However, this is often not the case with believers’ joy; even when there’s a misfortune, the person remains joyful. Certainly, the person acknowledges the mishap but isn’t moved or discouraged by it. Joy within the Spirit boosts one’s resilience. 

Happiness is a state, not a trait; in other words, it isn’t a long-lasting, permanent feature or personality trait, but a more fleeting, changeable state, meaning that happiness is not to be confused with joy.

I choose joy

Joy is the settled assurance that God is in control of all the details of my life, the quiet confidence that ultimately everything is going to be alright and the determined choice to praise God in every situation. 

Rick Warren

The scriptures made us understand we might undergo trials, tests, difficult times, and challenging moments in life, but as believers we have an assurance that things will end up good because our father is loving and he has overcome the world that we may defeat the trials and challenges in it. He has deposited the seed of joy in us, and it enables us to be optimistic and not lose our identity in face of difficulties. 

The seed of joy need to be cultivated in us as believers. Without it, we might lose our hope in difficult times. 

Joy as a fruit of the spirit must be expressed in our lives as believers. The Joy of the Lord births happiness, not in a temporary state but everlasting in nature. If you aren’t joyful you are likely to become an unhappy fellow. Joyful people express happiness. 

Rejoice within the Lord always [delight, gladden yourselves in Him]; again I say, Rejoice! Philippians 4:4

Staying joyful gives us hope and keeps us in faith. It opens us to the mindset that God has the capacity to do whatever we seek his intervention for according to his will.

Pay attention to the state of your mind always, you can choose Joy regardless of the happenings around you.

Oluwatosin A Adegoke
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Lessons from the wisdom teeth 2

Hey reader! Welcome back to my blog, You are cherished, you are valued and I love you just the way you are.

Comparison is a consideration or estimate of the similarities or differences between two things or people. Comparison is something we often do as humans. It may be on a positive note or negative note.

I tried comparing myself with friends and realized if I dwell on our differences or odds I may never be happy with myself.

While comparison atimes encourages us to be better, it may also create unhealthy feeling and if not guided against may lead to feeling less of yourself.

If you choose to live by comparison you may not get to know your Strength and weaknesses because you are aiming to be someone else and might end up with a competitive mindset.

You may have someone who has successfully attained the height you wish to and may want to emulate them. But, never forget that you are different, such that though you want to achieve what they are, you don’t get carried away with the pressure of wanting to work things out just the way they did.

You are different and exceptional. Celebrate your uniqueness.

Understand that you are a different personality and strive to be the best version of yourself not another person.

For example, If as a fat person I saw a nice gown on a slim lady, I can’t put on her gown, I can only sew mine with my measurements and make sure it suits my body.

In a different way, because am fat the style may not be good for me and may not look how it is on a slim person or lady.

In this scenario, my aim is to sew the same style but I did have to cut in a different length and measurement to get the desired result.

When comparing, always remind yourself you are a different person and unique in your own way.

By comparing ourself with others we tend to be impatient and not discover ourself or celebrate our uniqueness.

We must guide against comparison, as it is most time self destructive, creates feelings to make us unworthy or less than others.

As believers we may have to wait on God for some changes, new things, during this period do not be overwhelmed with comparison.
Stay in Joy

We must learn to trust, believe in and cling to God even as we expect our miracles, not by growing weary, fainting or yielding to envy and jealousy , embrace positive comparison and learn new ways also without creating an unhealthy mindsets.

Celebrate your uniqueness!

Comparison is a thief of Joy, Don’t get trapped in it.

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Lessons from the wisdom teeth 1

Hey reader! Good to have you read from my blog this time. In today’s post I will be sharing with you some life lessons I learnt from the wisdom teeth.

Sometime ago, I noticed I was having frequent pain on my teeth, so I thought about been consistent with brushing twice daily and I was doing well.

After a while the pain became serious that it was difficult for me to bite, chew or open my mouth. I had swellings, pain in the jaw and sleepless night due to the pain and had to visit a hospital to see a dentist.

After the check, she mentioned that my wisdom teeth was growing and explained that the wisdom teeth are called wisdom teeth because they’re the last teeth to emerge. And we are known to be wiser through it emergence.

She mentioned that all of the teeth a person will ever have are present at birth, higher up in the skull structure. First, a set of 20 baby teeth erupts and falls out, then 32 permanent teeth grows in.

The first set of molars usually becomes visible at age 6, the second set around 12, and the final set (wisdom teeth) sometime before age 21.

She emphasised the fact that I ought to grow the teeth before 21 and that if our wisdom teeth are hurting, it could simply be them growing in. When they break through the gums it can cause pain, slight swelling and soreness.

Impacted Tooth: If a wisdom tooth becomes impacted it can cause swelling, pain when chewing or biting, pain in the jaw and difficulty opening your mouth.

Impacted Tooth: If a wisdom tooth becomes impacted it can cause swelling, pain when chewing or biting, pain in the jaw and difficulty opening your mouth.

And, If the pain persists to Age 25, they may have to remove the teeth or the gum. She explained in medical terms tho, But your favorite writer can’t remember….. She prescribed medications to relieve the pain and I was much better in two days.

A friend got to know I was just growing wisdom teeth and was a bit surprised, we ended up joking about it that am still a Teenegar and in my sweet seventeen’s.

At the end of the conversation I thought about it that many of my friends had grown wisdom teeth at age 17 and 18, and mine is a bit different.

For some minutes, I felt like why would I have a setback with something so common at a particular age amidst peers?

I reminded myself immediately I was a different person, a unique personality and special in my own ways.

Lessons learnt

First, I realized as humans we can’t change everything, and we can’t control some circumstances or situations but can only work on how we see it or feel about some happenings.

As humans it is important to identify the parts of our lives that we can change and what we cannot. I can’t control when my teeth should grow and if I start to beat myself up because I had it late or create an inferiority mindset from it, I will definitely be unhappy because I have not chosen to accept that I can’t change when my teeth should grow.

Many people are unhappy today because they do not accept the things, situations or circumstances that they cannot change or have no control over. As a result many are depressed, frustrated, dissapionted and suffers.

There are many things we have control over, we can change our friends when we like, we can decide a dress isn’t good for us anymore and get a new one. You can decide to break-up from a relationship if you aren’t happy anymore.

Some of the things we can’t control as humans are:

The past

Don’t be stucked in trying to fix the past and rob yourself of enjoying the Present.

What other people think, feel or say about us.

Trying to please everyone or prove to everyone who you are to gain acceptance may be a sign of low self-esteem. You can’t please everyone!

Weather.

As humans we don’t have control on what weather condition we want for the day. If it rains heavily , we may have to change our schedules atimes but not the weather.

If because it raining we keep complaining and leave what can be done while it raining and focus on the complaint to wait for the rain to stop then we have not learnt to accept situations we can’t control and how to deal with them effectively.

Traffic.

Many drivers get impatient on road traffic but the truth is you can’t burn the cars ahead of you, neither can you ride on them. You either choose to follow a New route with no traffic (if there is) or stay calm till you can move.

As humans we must learn to be positive in any situation we are in, accept what it is and focus on approaching the situation in a positive manner and approach. We must also learn not to give up or feel inferior when will experience setbacks. We should be hopeful and understand it timing we definitely come.

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Son! Save your feet

Sometime ago while studying a chapter from the scriptures (Matthew 2) I discovered an unimaginable truth contrary to our general opinions and popular teachings from the chapter.

The chapter tells about the birth of Jesus Christ and how King Herod was so eager to visit the new born King and sought that the wise men search diligently for the young child with a reason that he wants to come and worship Him.

Smiles, one of our popular Christmas story series. Let’s see a verse from the chapter….

and he sent them to Bethlehem and said,Go and search diligently for the Young child;and when ye have found him, bring me word again,that I may come and worship him also. Matthew 2:8 KJV

That sounds interesting,true and relieving right, What!Am still alive and not planning to die soon was what I expected(laughing).Tho troubled he choose to act nice and be a perfect gentleman so we can judge that he has a good heart and doesn’t deserve to be disrespected which automatically would drive the wise men to report back to him after the search right?

As good as this sounds, when the wise men discovered where Jesus Christ is the scriptures in verse 12 tells that “being warned of God in a dream that they should not return to Herod they departed into their own country another way.”

Dear reader,with a new level comes a new devil, there always will be opposition,opponent, unhappy people at the rise of a new you, ideas or promotion and whatever height will attain daily or decision to be great we choose. It very important we seek to receive direction, instruction and hear God in everything we do.

I understand we have mentors, friends, leaders and authorities over us of which we have to be obedient to and atimes can give wrong counsels and instructions knowingly or unknowingly, atimes we loose focus listening to man’s voice, in our best thinking we think it the best, I might loose my job if I don’t do it, I don’t have any option, I just have to change the figures as ordered by my boss , Little do we understand it a trap to destruction.

It either you choose to listen to God’s voice and adhere strictly or choose the voice of men and miss God’s intentions and plan forus.

Remember, King Herod acted like he had no bad intention,This days out of selfishness there are humans who appear, talk and counsel us from there mouth not there heart and because we’ve been friends for long we trust and entrust our life to them forgetting the creator who sees and search the heart of man, we are too quick to seek advice from them to waiting patiently to hear what God’s intent is to us.

Each day you choose to satisfy your environment or please people by leaving God aside, you’ve only chosen to live and act less of who you’ve been accustomed to be.

Following God’s routes or the right route to exhibit a plan may not be easy, there may be false accusations, rejections and lonely times once you choose to do things in right or a different way, but always bear in mind that obeying God’s voice will save your feets off troubles.

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you,saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. Jeremiah 29:11, KJV

Don’t be carried away with the noise around you. Recognize, listen and choose to obey God’s voice.

Scrutinize all advice and ideas by God testing(checking if it in line with God’s standard through his word) before applying them.

© Oluwatosin Adebimpe Adegoke

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Starting the year blue

Hey reader, Today’s post is quite long but of great lessons, please endeavor to read to the end.

I guess you are eager to understand what it means to start the year blue, you’re probably thinking I want to start a blue color campaign. Maybe it is or not, continue reading.

The blue color is popular, and mostly used in airlines, hospitals, and large companies and it is popularly known as men’s favorite.

Well, am not a man but a lady with blue color as my favorite because it has a cool calming effect on black skin girls like me.

The blue color is known to signify, Loyalty, Confidence, Stability, Faith, Intelligence, Strength, Wisdom, and Trust.

The blue color is a sky color that shows how well we desire to be successful and to be on top of the world, it is a sea color that signifies peace.

But we can’t deny the fact that we have different shades of blue which aren’t to be written about today. We all understand the sky gets dark especially at night, a time cloudy, sometimes dark with shining stars, and times no star.

Each shade has its meaning and information it pass across. Times when the sky is dark or cloudy it indicate stormy situations in our life as humans and when it blue, it signifies Peace.

Friends, as we walk and work through the year there will be days we are up and strong (Blue moments) and there will be days we are hopeless, discouraged, impatient, and bothered about tomorrow and the future.

Days we may lose interest in the beautiful things we intend doing and the year seems not worth witnessing. These are the day’s blue color is now a mixture of black and darkness that seems to overshadow it.

Each time this occurs you need to be determined to live and get the blue by staying positive and optimistic (hopeful and confident) about the future.

Don’t try to switch your color to black, be focused on the positive part, and stay true to your identity.

Remember, For a new level there always will be a new devil. For each phase of life, there is always a mountain to climb.

Let see how the blue color significance relates to us having a prosperous year.

Strength

“Philippians 4:13 For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me STRENGTH.” The blue color represents strength therefore believe you are strengthened to overcome challenges, the scriptures stated clearly you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you.

Faith

“Luke 17:6 The Lord answered, “If you had FAITH even as small as a mustard seed, you could say to this mulberry tree, ‘May you be uprooted and be planted in the sea,’ and it would obey you!”. Faith here gives a natural capacity that enables you to trust and believe.

Confidence

Be confident, never allow fear to limit you, be confident that Christ’s strength is enabled in you and you can do the unimaginable.

Matthew 6:34 “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”

Wisdom

Wisdom

Proverbs 2:12 “WISDOM will save you from evil people, from those whose words are twisted.” Apply wisdom in all your doings.

Trust

Proverbs 3:5TRUST in the LORD with all your heart; do not depend on your understanding.

Let your eyes be fixed, don’t be distracted by so many options around you, you can always trust God.

Loyalty

“Psalms78:8 They would not be like their ancestors a stubborn and rebellious generation, whose hearts were not loyal to God, whose spirits were not faithful”.

Stability

“James:6-7 But he must ask in faith, without doubting, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. 7That man should not expect to receive anything from the Lord.” Stability, To experience stability in 2020, Never allow doubt and fear to rule you, Fuel your heart with faith, not fear.

Finally,

Rejoicing in Trials

(Philippians 1:2-8)

2Consider it pure joy, my brothers, when you encounter trials of many kinds, 3because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. 4Allow perseverance to finish its work, so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

5Now if any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. 6But he must ask in faith, without doubting, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. 7That man should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. 8He is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways.

You are created by God (love) and loved by Him, Reciprocate love, Live it, Receive it, show it and demonstrate it. 

Welcome to the blue era 

I love you

Oluwatosin Adegoke.

First published January 10,2020

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5 ways to improve your mental health.

As humans, we deal with endless and mind-boggling situations daily. Sometimes we feel anxious, stressed, overwhelmed, and become mentally ill. 

According to Wikipedia, “Mental health is the level of psychological well-being or an absence of mental illness. It is the state of someone who is “functioning at a satisfactory level of emotional and behavioral adjustment”.

Mental health is more than just the absence of mental disorders or disabilities, preserving and restoring mental health is crucial on an individual basis. Mental health deals with your emotional, psychological, and social well-being. It affects how you think, feel, act, and also determine how you handle stress, relate to others, and make choices. 

Below are five ways to improve your mental health.

1. Make positive Confessions.

Positive Confessions help to remind you who you are, It does not allow you to define yourself through the lens of a negative feeling or circumstances. It is a healthy way to build your self-confidence and develop healthy self-esteem. To successfully stay positive you must challenge all thoughts on negativity and repeatedly confess positivity.

  1. Exercise

An exercise is a physical form of activity that helps to ease symptoms of depression and anxiety which makes you feel better. Exercise helps to take your mind off worries and negative thoughts, it helps you to gain confidence and get more social interaction. Get to work. Exercise

  1. Practice mindfulness.

Our thoughts control us it is the way we picture things in our mind we often get to see it happens. This is why it is important to take time and work out our thoughts consciously. Mindfulness can help you enjoy life more and understand yourself better. Paying attention to your thoughts, feelings, and the world around you allows you to see the moments. Mindfulness can positively change the way you feel about life and how you approach challenges. Thought cross-check helps you notice signs of stress or anxiety which help you to deal with them better. Watch your thoughts.

  1. Take a break.

Take a break from things that stress you and are harmful to your emotional health.

  1. Work your strength. 

Working your strength is a stronger path of growth and a better way of Life. Do something you are good at to build self-confidence. We all have some skills that just make us powerful and engaged.

Identifying your strength, paying attention to it, and pushing for more training around your strength helps you build confidence. Focusing on your strength will make you find ways to unleash your potential.

Conclusion

“Sometimes self care is exercise and eating right. Sometimes it’s spending time with loved ones or taking a nap. And sometimes it’s watching an entire season of TV in one weekend while you lounge around in your pajamas. Whatever soothes your soul.” Nanea Hoffman

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Blueroof

Dwelling under a roof named earth

Each day we look up to the sky to see if the day is up

For we know it full of colours,shades which works with time and seasons

Atimes dark, Atimes cloudy

And atimes blue,

For each day we see the sky blue we are certain to get the best of it,

But when it cloudy and dark, uncertainty sets in,which might indicate stormy situations in our life as humans.

Tho the sky stays dark atimes it never remains dark

Bad day’s aren’t permanent, the roof may be dark and cloudy today

Tommorow bright, and blue

Never be overwhelmed with the thought of what’s not working out

Live each day as tho it blue and be ready to get the best of all moments.

💕
❤
💕

Welcome to the blue era

Oluwatosin Adegoke

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Knowing your identity as a believer. The believer’s lens

What defines you as a believer?

Dear reader,

Thanks for choosing to read from the king delight. Have a great read!

The more we focus on who we are in Christ, the less it matters who we were in the past, or even what happened to us.We do not behave out of our identity, we behave out of our understanding of our identity in Christ. Shelley Hendrix

Many of us have been defined by circumstances, what people think, and past occurrences. You need to understand that you can’t live beyond what you see yourself as.

How we see ourself determines how far we can go in life, it tells how will treat ourself and helps us to create gaps for unhealthy situations, approach, and interactions.

We are made in the likeness of His image and our identity should conform to what he says about us.

There’s need to consciously search and meditate on the scriptures to be fully aware of our identity, live it, and not be carried away by what people say or think.

Your identity should not be built on position, certifications, achievements, skills, or roles in partnership and relationships, the day these things become non-valuable to you, you may begin to struggle for acceptance.

As a believer, You don’t need to struggle for acceptance, you’ve been accepted by Christ.

If you read through Ephesians 1, you will discover some unhealthy identity we may have, Like, Feeling orphaned instead of Adoption, Rejected instead of accepted, and In bondage instead of covered by grace.

Some people form their identity by their service or the works they do for the Lord.

If we still think we are under the law, we may subdue ourselves in ministry or service or other good works to feel as though you are in good standing with God instead of resting in his love and work on the Cross.

We may think it is what we do for God that dictates us or should be what we should be addressed as or recognized with, No it should not be

Our identity should be solely on how God sees us and not how we see ourselves.

Our identity should be solely on how God sees us, not how we see ourselves.

thekingsdelight.home.blog

Living our God identity would give us the freedom to live confidently. It will help us to experience God’s love for us in new ways. It will also make us bold to share Christ’s love with all.

If we live base on how God sees us, we would not need to find our worth in circumstances, positions, titles, or based on external things.

To consciously live the reality of how God sees us may be quite challenging as we live in a world that seeks to define us by its standard. But It is a challenge which if embraced or engaged in, could impact everything about us.

A simple suggestion on how to live this reality is to make biblical confessions and boldly declare it daily to yourself till you come to the full understanding of who you are in Christ Jesus and living it.

Here are some Truth on who you are from the scriptures

I am the salt of the earth and the light of the world (see Matt. 5:13-14).

I am an heir of God and a joint-heir with Jesus Christ (see Rom. 8:17).

I am part of a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, and a people for God’s possession (see 1 Pet. 2:9).

I am a member of the body of Christ (see 1 Cor. 12:27).

When you know who you are, you know what to do

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Tips on building healthy and Purposeful friendship

Building healthy and Purposeful friendship

thekingsdelight.home.blog

Show me your friend, and I will tell you how close you are to succeed.


As a teenager, I had learned to consciously and deliberately choose friends. I remember while preparing for university, advice from a brother to me was to choose my friends wisely.

Friend’s can either make or mar you, choose wisely.


Who you associate with determines a lot about you. You may wonder what your friends have to do with your life or what you are becoming.

The kind of people you hang out with influence you in all spheres of living. The categories of people you relate with times determine your appearance, thought (patterns of thinking), behaviors, and decision.

True and growing friendship is built-in on the unity of mind and agreement.

When you walk with people of like minds and dreams, It expose you to knowledge and opportunities that foster the reality of your goals, purpose, and dreams.

Be careful who you relate with, and who you choose as friends.

What do you spend time doing with your friends?
What do you talk or discuss?
What do you do when you are together?
How does he/she see things?
Does he/she see the same way?
Are we growing together or apart?

If you spend time gossiping, you end up a gossip expert!

Spend time investing in your future by adding values through effective and productive communication that prepares you to fit for purpose.

Do not hold to a friendship that lacks positive value to you morally, verbally, in character development, spiritual and other areas of life.

Positive associations bring positive impact, influence, and results.
Choose wisely.
Live purpose

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Tips on how to deal with Peer pressure

Have you ever made a decision, and a while felt it wasn’t right? Left to you, you may not have welcomed the idea? That is it! Peer pressure

What is peer influence?

In a more friendly tone, Peer pressure is Peer influence. Peer influence is when you choose to do something you wouldn’t otherwise do because you want to feel accepted and valued by your friends. 

Peer pressure ( influence ) can either be positive or negative. For example, during my secondary school days, I had to discipline myself to study hard because my friends and I want an excellent remark on all our subjects. I can’t afford to be the black sheep. Peer pressure or influence can also be in a negative form. A friend once narrated how he wanted to feel among by taking a glass of alcohol during his secondary school days.

Difference between positive and negative influence.

Positive influence drives you to be better, focused, aim, and pursue your goals and aspirations. Negative peer influence times distract you from what matters to you. It makes you practice what isn’t appealing to you.

Many teenagers face pressure to give in to negative influence and need knowledge on how to kick against it.

Positive influence drives you to be better, focused, aim, and pursue your goals and aspirations. Negative peer influence most times distracts you from what matters to you. It makes you practice what isn’t appealing to you.

Below are six tips on how to deal with Peer pressure or influence.

Tips on how to deal with Peer pressure

  1. Identify your interest; Identify the things that drive you to become better, your gifts, talents, and potentials. It helps you to choose the right set of peers.
  2. Recognize unhealthy situations and keep away from them.
  3. Set boundaries; Define your do’s and don’t and yield to discipline yourself.
  4. Learn to say No to excuse yourself from negative ideas or suggestions creatively. For example, I don’t have much interest in it. It a good idea tho I won’t love to be a part.
  5. Respect other people’s opinions; Don’t try to force your thoughts on your peer. Respect their opinion but don’t give in to it if negative.
  6. Spend time with people who respect your decision.

Conclusion.

As a teenager, if you will be yielding to peer pressure, it should be on a positive side. If you have friends who influence your thoughts, plans, and aspirations positively, don’t be far from them.

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How to deal with Rejection

Rejection is a significant source of pain for many of us. While some enjoy rejection, some will not love to suffer rejection.

What is Rejection?

Rejection is an act of being rejected or an act of not accepting something or someone. Jesus faced many challenges, including rejection from His community while on earth.

Matthew 13: 53- 57

53 When Jesus had finished these parables,(B) he moved on from there. 54 Coming to his hometown, he began teaching the people in their synagogue,(C) and they were amazed. (D) “Where did this man get this wisdom and these miraculous powers?” they asked. 55 “Isn’t this the carpenter’s son? (E) Isn’t his mother’s(F) name Mary, and aren’t his brothers(G) James, Joseph, Simon, and Judas? 56 Aren’t all his sisters with us? Where then did this man get all these things?” 57 And they took offense(H) at him. But Jesus said to them, “A prophet is not without honor except in his town and his own home.”(I) 58 And he did not do many miracles there because of their lack of faith.

The scriptures stated that He could not perform many miracles there because of their lack of faith.

People from his community had doubts about him. No one believed him, they narrated his background to each other and felt he doesn’t worth the works they see him do.

So many of us have been wounded by those we love, family, and friends by rejection.

How do you handle rejection?

1 Learn to consistently reject rejections by choosing to see yourself from the light of who God says you are, whom he has called you to be, and what you are to do.

2 People will love to remind, what your background looks like, mistakes, flaws, weaknesses, and past to make you feel you are not capable or fit for some things.

If you find yourself often being rejected by peers, you need to shake off the rejection and move on with life by not allowing their view to overcoming yours.

3 Christ’s love for you is unconditional, so embrace the love of God and head towards to Live your goal. Don’t try to prove to people all because you want to be accepted. 

4 Don’t try to please people by doing what they think or want. The only way to overcome negative rejections is to Walk away from it. Don’t give in to pressure.

5 Associate with people who respect your decisions and are willing to help you live your christ ordained path(purpose).

Conclusion

Regardless of where rejection is coming from, you have to learn to handle it right.

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Memories

You and I have memories longer than the road that stretches out ahead. Some days won’t be long like we thought, they come as shades, and fade away so fast. Tho the doors are full of web, cos the less we curb, the more we see. The memories determines what will feel when the days are gone.

If wishes were roses, I would wish the memories were as beautiful as the smiles. But the cobwebs were too great to rid off, cos the more we curb, the less we see.

And, as the drama unfolds, our antagonist became weak, clamours for freedom with no wisdom. In a bid to revive it own nature, he lost it self dignity and worth.

There were many claps to it roars from the beginning but as the consequence approached, the protagonist grew stronger. For the day of reckoning is soon to come.

Memories are timeless treasures of the heart. Life holds many simple blessings to bear us a smile daily.

If wishes were horses, I would wish the memories are real like we sometimes think they should.

Good times or bad days, Take a selfless pill to create good feelings. Never ruin good memories with a moment of uncertainty. People change, memories don’t.

Good days or bad days, Take a selfless pill to create good feelings to folks around

Things end but memories last forever.

© Oluwatosin Adebimpe

Once upon a time…
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Stronger than you think

“Life is very interesting. In the end, some of your greatest pains become your greatest strengths.”
– Drew Barrymore

Everything can be taken away from you including your dignity, But the power to choose what attitude you have toward the traumatic events that have happened to you will never be taken away‍‍.

Beyond the pain in life,there is always a silver lining and light at the end of the tunnel.

Dear reader,
When the glowing stops glowing, And the glooms and boom gets glume.

We there be a triller to pull your triggers off. We there be a switch to control our turns and fix our paths to focus on light. We know not when the stars are fixed to shine without struggles, but they appear in the dark.

Better days are near! Don’t give up

© Oluwatosin Adegoke.

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Closer than a brother

Proverb 18:24 A man that hath many friends must show himself friendly, but there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother.

While growing up, I had a friend, whom a fateful day walked up to me and said we aren’t friends anymore because she found a new friend. This happened not long after she noticed something she does and thought would be reciprocated by me, of which I had no idea. We both had not learned that everyone is different and unique in their way.


The event changed lot about me and was a bit traumatic. I tried to build a friendship with fellow mates but to no avail. I struggled with low self-esteem and became a loner with many people around.


Each time I try to talk amidst peers and remember the event coupled with a reality that it had many eyewitnesses. I withdraw from conversations and choose to watch because I feel I do not have a say.
I lost trust in everyone because I felt she knew me better. I could not welcome help from anyone or embrace friendship from the ones willing.


I lost myself trying to please everyone, and it lasted than I could ever thought. I had not come to understand JESUS is one whom I can confide in, trust and have a real friendship with!!! (gist for another read )


Many people still struggle with this and have no idea how to go about it.
Healing from various life issues and experiences do not jump on us. Most especially pains rooted in broken relationships (friendship).
It starts from somewhere!

Here’s a note to you from a brother and friend. Nkidom Daniel

Dearest reader!


Have you ever been betrayed, disrespected, and bullied by friends? Or have you been rejected, ridiculed, and unfairly treated by them?
Are you trying to please, appeal, and dance to their tune to gain their acceptance?
Are you trying to feel wanted and be among a circle?

These causes loneliness, moodiness, even down to depression. We all need a friend to talk to, someone to gist, and share our burdens.


Other times, you might need a friend to confide in, someone to advise and not judge you, a friend to help and support you, But no one seems close or available to help!. And trust me, this can be very frustrating and demoralizing.


Because it creates a vacuum in the heart, it makes the soul-sick and the spiritual longing for companionship!!!
Over time it makes us withdraw from people and affect our self-esteem.
You may ask how did I know
I’ve been in this situation and have walked on this lane!
But you know what?
There was a turning point! There was great help!

A good friend with a big heart stepped in. Jesus chose to fill the vacuum and made me be among His circles. He lifted the burdens and took away the hurdles!


Proverb 18:24 makes us understand that “A man that hath many friends must show himself friendly, but there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother.”

He never breaks a heart. Neither does he disappoint and abandon his friends.


Esteem reader,
All is not gloom, life is not doom.
Don’t be dismayed. There is still a friend to you. There is someone you can trust. Jesus craves to have you in his circle!

Invite him into your circle. He will stick closer! And will remain forever!
Selah!
(This is to anyone heartbroken, lonely, and depressed)
Storyline by Oluwatosin Adebimpe Adegoke

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Dealing with fear, worry and anxiety

Fear is an emotion or feeling of panic or nervousness that hits us mostly when we think of doing something new. We are usually very motivated and excited at the start of a new project.

As we begin to make plans and progress, the thought of what if (fears or anxiety) set In. In these moments, we begin to have pessimistic views about what we want to do.

Fear is a spirit that produces feelings. Studies have shown that the biggest problem in people’s lives is fear.

Many of us struggle with anxiety. Every time God puts new ideas or visions in our hearts, there is always an opposing phase. God calls us to a new level, and for every new level, there’s a new challenge. Accompanying this new challenge is a choice to either have faith and move ahead regardless of what is thrown at you or sit back and nurture your fears.

Sometimes, circumstances may want to stir up fear because things happening do not look like what God has promised you. 

Remember, the bible says in 2Tim.1.7 For God has not given us a spirit of fear but of power and love and a sound mind.

Fear is one of the enemy’s most popular weapons that he uses against us. Worry, anxiety, and fear can overwhelm us with a thick shadow of darkness, controlling our every move and decisions. Yet reality tells us that so much of what we spend our time worrying about never even happens. Living under the weight of the “what if’s” is a hard place to dwell.

Be bold and courageous

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go. Joshua 1:9

Seize the opportunity to grow

A times God allows difficult circumstances in our lives because he is trying to reveal something that needs to be strengthened or changed in us. Confront your fears, Take flight, Face your fears, face the situation, don’t run away from it.

Starve your fears, feed your faith.  It strengthens us to keep pressing forward regardless of what lies around us

Walk with God

Following God is often like walking in a fog. We can only see one or two steps in front of us, but as we take those step, the next become clearer.

So do not fear, for I am with you;do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10

Shift your focus from what if to what is.

Philippians 4:8, NIV: “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.

We can defeat fear by choosing to be courageous, choosing to keep pressing forward while the feeling of fear is present

The basis for not allowing fear is knowing and believing God is with us in all we do. We can defeat fear by choosing to be courageous, choosing to keep pressing forward while the feeling of fear is present. 

Think about excellence not fear

If we want to do anything significant, we have to be determined to face our fears and never give up on our dreams.

It’s not always easy, and it often comes down to a choice:

•Choosing not to allow fear and anxiety to control your life.

•Choosing to guard your heart.

•Choosing to focus your mind on what is true amid uncertain times.

Conclusion

We might still feel afraid, but we can believe that God is with us. We may not be in control, but we can trust the One who is. We may not know the future, but we can trust the God who does.

Remember, His words are “life” words, soothing to our soul, calming to our spirits, giving power to our days.

Stay strong.

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Cloud of emotion

There are diverse notions and ideologies the world has made us think love is. Some of these thoughts and definitions have built our belief, values, and morals.


Hey friend, It good to have you read here. I’m not a love doctor or a love practitioner. I’m a simple lady, loved by God.


A Cloud of emotion represents an atmosphere you haven’t exercise true love. But of an idea or belief that love is base on conditional terms, action, and most times a description of our thought and will.

Friends, I know there are a lot of definition to what love is. Contrary to what you may think, I’m not writing to explain or disagree with many of the definitions. But you sure to receive the best and ever-relevant definition.

What is love?

Love is power. It is the lifeline that keeps us living the fullness of God. Love is not, and never would be a feeling. 


Here’s what love is according to the scriptures

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. 1Corithians13

Love is not feeling. It is a decision, a decision to treat and see people how Jesus would treat them.

Love is deliberate, Love is intentional.
Love is sacrificial, Love is giving.

Christ love is deep. We may acquire knowledge and still not know or understand how to live it.


Apostle Paul in his letter to the Ephesians 3:14-20 wrote

For this reason, I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named, that according to the riches of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being.

So that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith–that you, being rooted and grounded in love, May have the strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.

The love walk is a lifestyle we must choose to prioritize regardless of what happen around us.


Learning to live and relate in love gives a mutual understanding in relationship and also fosters our walk with God. Love conquer all things.

Prayer

Lord Jesus, show and teach me to Love. Open my heart to receive your love, and teach me to live in love.
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Tales of silence

Some stories are hard to tell, for the wounds and scars they give aren’t befitting to share without tears.

Grieve has taken over our land and the heart of citizens fight battles in there mind day after day.

Our security been exchanged for insecurities, and our heritage exchanged for position,titles and fame.

Oh some stories are hard to tell,
but time and season will unleash them all.

A day is soon to birth it tales, Yes, a day the silence will be broken and will shall share fearlessly how the Lord gave oasis to our desert, and our mouth filled with laughter.

That day we will make solemn sounds, scream joyfully and shout how great the lord has given us victory.

For we are tired of all shades of black uniform terrorizing us in our territory.

Read more about what the ENDSARS protest in Nigeria is about. Click to read #Endsars#Endpolicebrutality.


#Voice of a Nigerian
#NIGERIA
#ENDSARS
#ENDSWAT
#END POLICE BRUTALITY

We hope for a new Nigeria

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What to do when life seems tough or difficult?

Growing up, I struggled with anxiety at an early stage. I had learned not to trust anyone.

As healthy as that may sound, it can be harmful when it comes to building valuable relationships with people.

In those dark and dreary moments, I feel a sense of security and love from my savior Jesus Christ. Though as a child, I doubted his existence especially when he doesn’t move the mountain I wish he should move.

As humans, we are faced with a load of challenges day after day. Examples are Health issues, lost business, a relationship falls apart, or Poor academic performances.

So, What do you do when life seems Tough?

According to some friends, Pray, sleep, Be still and calm, Get tougher, Count your blessings, and Trust God.

Beloved, there are countless ways to deal with difficult times, both positive and negative.

Today I will be sharing with you one thing to do when life seems Tough.

As an infant, most of us are prone to lose our confidence and hope in God or people in a time of disappointment and difficulties.

Sometimes we throw our Trust (confidence) in Christ in a pit and pray to God to take away our challenges, problems, or difficulties as fast and capable as he is. And when the answers aren’t forthcoming, we lose hope.

Trusting God is not about a moment but a lifetime.

A friend shared with me how she prayed that her mum and dad live peacefully together, so they wouldn’t divorce. The interesting part was that they separated in her presence not long after she prayed.

Though she was unhappy about the situation, she remembered the last time she prayed about it. She received the instruction to pray for strength through the difficulty and face it.

She realized the need to accept the reality that they are separated and trust God to walk her through the new phase or change.

Prayer is important. Trusting is key.

A time our lack of Faith, Trust, Fear, or hopelessness tends to energize us to make impromptu prayers or declare a fast.

Some people feel you didn’t pray well or do things right. Perhaps, many times you are only interested in getting the problem solved that we never pay attention to what God wants us to learn through hard times.

Dear beloved, I have come to preach the good news of Trusting God and resting in the Lord promises through the scriptures.

What does it mean to trust?

To trust means to believe that somebody is honest, cannot harm, cannot take advantage of you, and is reliable.

Trusting God boosts our confidence in facing challenging situations.

Ever wondered why people find alternative ways to get their problems solved?

It is because they are impatient, lack trusting, and have refused to exercise their faith in Christ Jesus.

One important fruit of the spirit that we must exercise as believers is patience. You need to be ready to wait as long you trust in God for a turnaround.

According to Joyce Meyer “Patience is waiting with the right attitude.” 

Build your faith with the scriptures, Make the scripture’s the lens through which you see yourself.

Never let the voice of men walk you out of the Victory you have in Christ Jesus.

Remember, Nahum 1:7 (NIV)

The Lord is good, a refuge in times of trouble. He cares for those who trust in him.

A man that lacks Faith and trust will be inconsistent in his ways. If we trust in the Lord and rest on his promises to us in the scriptures, our peace shall have no bounds.

Our insecurities only have a cure that is secure in Christ. Though darkness seems to deepen, surely it will fade away.

We can enjoy life no matter what is going on. Yes! You can, regardless of your circumstances.

Rely on him absolutely for help at all times and in every situation.

Stop seeing God as an alternative!

You can download Trust in you by Lauren Diagle, click to download.

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Tips on handling Change or Transition


Transition can be defined as a movement from one state, condition, or circumstance to another.

Change is inevitable. There are different heights to the issues we experience daily as humans. Times we are prompted to do things differently (out of the box).

Change may vary from simplicity to complexity. It may be as simple as relocating to a new environment, loosing or increasing body weight, Promotion at a workplace, or the unexpected loss of a friend and family member. Some of these changes are what you might have experienced and will still experience.

Learn to adjust yourself to the conditions you have to endure, but make a point of trying to alter or correct conditions so that they are most favorable to you. –William Frederick Book

Many country was locked down for months due to the effect of the Coronavirus (COVID-19) outbreak. All economic and non-economic activities on hold.

Our daily routines and activities disrupted, and we had no option than to stay indoors.

Another change due to the outbreak was keeping close physical contact with friends, family, relatives, and Associates can be risky.

We need to understand that change affects every aspect of our lives. It may be positive or negative. But many of us probably aren’t as well equipped to deal with changes as we think.

Here are a few tips on embracing change with positivity.

Accept the situations and approach them with the readiness of the mind.

We must learn to accept situations and approach them with the readiness of mind. Do not avoid changes that seem to have a negative impact, Face it.

Consciously make time to work out your thought pattern

Our thoughts control us. It is the way you picture things in your mind you often get to see it happen. Practice mindfulness and watch your thoughts.

Identify who you are

The way to regain confidence in seasons of change is by identifying and consciously reminding ourselves who we are, our values, and worth. Who you think you are should not be built on tittles, positions, circumstances, material things, or income, but majorly on a positive self-thought and image.

Stay positive

To stay positive, we would have to challenge all thoughts on negativity and repeatedly confess positive things.

Take a break

Take a break. It may be necessary times to heal and be confident. Take a break from things that stress you and harmful to your emotional health.

Try new things

For a time like this, you can try new things, add skills through courses online.

Conclusion

No matter what happens, the change will happen, embrace positivity, and always be intentional to learn and make the most of it.

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Overcoming Distraction

“When you are able to overcome distractions, then you will be able to do something more specific, something more precise and definite with the time that you have.” Sunday Adelaja

A little wander in our thought to embrace doubt, anxiety, and worry can get us distracted and make us lose our focus faster than we can think of.

We need to be conscious of the little things that separate us from God, his will, and standards. One of the easy tips of the devil to draw us away from God is a distraction.

Distraction is a state of being distracted or a rearranged state of mind. It a state in which our attention diverts from possibility, solution, and our thoughts majors on what could have been and how it must be even when things seem not working out.

If Jesus had sat and worried about what the pain at the cross would be, He might have chosen not to bear our burdens and reject the Masters will, but He endured the cross, disregarding its shame and now seated at the right hand of the throne of God. The victory that comes after trials, pains, and challenges are always beyond the pain.

If we keep pondering on our struggles and troubles, we would compound our problems and create room for anxiety. Immediately Peter got distracted (shifted his thought pattern) when walking on water with Jesus he starts to sink.

Each time life seems unbearable, the right seems hard to do or follow, we should always remember he doesn’t give to our hand what we cannot handle.

“Hebrews 12:2 says”

Looking away [from all that will distract] to Jesus, Who is the Leader and the Source of our faith [giving the first incentive for our belief] and is also its Finisher [bringing it to maturity and perfection]. He, for the joy [of obtaining the prize] that was set before Him, endured the cross, despising and ignoring the shame, and is now seated at the right hand of the throne of God.

We must choose to understand in trying times that he will make a way and that He is faithful and will never allow us to be tempted beyond our ability.

“Doubt distracts, and through doubt comes fear, and fear gives an option to quit at the rise of new challenges.” Oluwatosin Adebimpe Adegoke

Stay focused

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